I Love...Thee?

So...after only seeing my girlfriend for about a month or so and she's uttered those three words to me. My first thought? "Oh crap."

She's not on MySpace anymore so I'm safe to write this however, it *is* important for me to note this down...I use MySpace primarily to write as a journal, and making people laugh or read the blogs is a secondary act.

So after my escapade weekend with her I call her to see what was up with the rally she was at (she participated in the Immigration Reform Rally on Monday). She informs me that the meat she gave me wasn't good and wanted to come over and switch out that meat for the one that was cooking longer (The lamb meat I had wasn't boiled to a certain amount of time).

"It's okay! I don't mind. I can just boil it longer myself" I tell her. "Nooo, I don't feel right letting you eat that meat." And so she comes over and drops off some better meat. I keep the older meat anyway.

So Tuesday she comes over also. She misses me and comes over during the evening. We talk and chat a lot about stuff like we always do, about topics such as:

1. The guy that keeps calling her every day....every 5 minutes or something.
2. How the guy is telling her to break up with me and hook up with him,
3. What her daughter thinks of me,
4. Spanish,
5. Why I'm always talking to Jose,
6. Her trying to find out how many girlfriends I have had,
7. What kind of plans we have for this weekend lined up, and
7. Reading a letter from my friend Anna Caroline in Brazil.

So I was asking her when she was leaving, out of curiousity really, a couple of times. She took it as a hint for her to leave and needless to say much she was upset and left...I thought she was kidding around all the way up until her car left my driveway....that's when I realized...SHE'S MAD. Oops.

Anyway she calls later and we talk and she realizes that I wasn't asking her to leave and apologizes for leaving like that. We talk more, things too personal to discuss here, but nevertheless we hang up.

I get a text page from her not too long later and my stomach almost turns:

"I love you bebe."

Oh crap. How do I respond? I don't love her yet but I can't just leave her hanging. So I respond with:

":) You're so great!"

Okay so it wasn't that great a response well it's better than saying I love you when I don't mean it, and it's better than not responding.

Now I'm stuck in a rut....SOOO STUCK. So many things are running through my head:

- Do I really want to have a relationship with this person?
- Am I really okay that she has kids not my own?
- Is single life better than being in a relationship?
- Am I going to marry this person?
- Am I going to hurt her emotionally? How is that going to turn out?
- Maybe I shouldn't have spent this much time with her.
- I don't want to her hurt her.
- Should I go back to single life, and take my chances on finding someone else?
- Why did she have to have kids...
- What are my parents going to think about all this?!?

I'm very confused at how I should feel at the moment, now that things have shifted to second or third gear in this relationship. Oh crap oh crap oh crap...what if I never love this person? I'd like to play this relationship by ear...but love? Ohhhhhh man.

The Rejection Hotline

Are you a woman and had a guy who just wouldn't leave you alone?

Was he always bugging you for your number even though you've told him repeatedly you're not interested?

Didn't you have to make up some number just to give to him, only to have your point not made across?

Well now there's a way for you to give these guys the right message. The next time a guy bugs you and you're just tired of him clinging to you like a lost puppy, give him this number:

408-985-6161

Memorize this number, give it to your friends, whatever you need to do because some woman out there is going to appreciate having this number.

Go ahead, call the number and see what it's all about.

A WHOLE Weekend with the Girlfriend

I think this was the first weekend I spent the whole time doing something with a girlfriend.

What's the point of being in a relationship? Is it the make-out sessions? The company? Support? Sex? What?

As I pondered the time spent with my girlfriend one of the first things that came to mind was:

I won't be dancing with anyone else for a long time.

My girlfriend is totally capable of salsa dancing however she isn't a pro...and I feel that I'm a salsa snob for even bringing that up however I do not feel challenged enough when I dance with her. It would be nice to be able to spread my "wings" and really take flight when I'm dancing. With all the time and weekends spent with her (I'm deducing this isn't going to be the last weekend) it'll be awhile before I can actually do this. However with time, I think, she will become better and more accustomed to slot-based salsa dancing.

I think most people can relate when it comes to relationships in dancing. Unless both of you are really good or know a lot of people in the dancing community where you can dance with people other than together, you're pretty much stuck. None of my girlfriend's friends are salsa dancers like Darci, Giana, Ruby, etc. just to name a few.

Comparing, I was thinking in my head what a relationship with a strong salsa dancer would be like, and immediately I thought to Ana from Miami. My adventures with her in Miami was probably a good example of how, if, the scenario would look if I had a girlfriend that was hot into salsa dancing; she'd dance a few songs with me here and there but most of the night would be spent dancing with other people. This would be good for me because at least both of us can enjoy salsa dancing at our desired levels, which is me dancing a few songs and watching for most of the night whereas my counterpart can dance the night away without being pulled down. We'd both have fun throughout the night then of course at the end of the night we'd head home for own private dance routine. Haha. Anyway...

I spoke to Jose about my thoughts, to which he said "what's wrong with that? Do you ever see me dancing with I'm not with Sandra?" I suppose I'm supposed to weigh in the other relationship benefits but man I was tired after this whole weekend.

As silly as it was, I didn't hate the time spent with her but kind of wished I had more time to play video games. Yeah I know, anxious to play a game? How nerdy.

So what did I do that was so exhausting?

Friday:
7:30 - 1:00am
Girlfriend met at my place and we drove by motorcycle to Pzano's in Castro Valley to have pizza dinner with Tanushka and friends. had pineapple n' ham pizza. No one likes it except Ben. Watched Final Fantasy Advent Children when we got back home.

Saturday:
10:00 - 12:00pm
Girlfriend watched "Having Fun w/ Dick and Jane." Girlfriend laughs at all the Mexican related jokes. Worked on salsa on computer while she was watching. Caught up with MySpace.

12:00pm - 8:00pm
Lunch at Super Taqueria. Had my first Torta. It's like a hamburger. Drove on motorcycle to down south. Dinner at a vietnamese noodle place. Dropped girlfriend off. I go back to playing Ghost Recon. I repeat the same location over and over because I keep getting shot at.

9:00pm
While playing video games, girlfriend calls me and asks if I was ready. "Ready for what" I ask. "For dancing!" says she wants to go salsa dancing because her brother wants to go out. She says to be ready in an hour.

11:30pm - 12:30am
Salsa dancing. Had to hold hands with girlfriend the whole time. Wondered if I could lose girlfriend during the night so I can dance with other people. All hope is lost when I realized I'm stuck...bad.

Sunday:
11:00am - 1:00pm
Girlfriend comes over with free boxes of "Bimbo" snacks. Girlfriend watches "Waiting" while I go online and catch up on some MySpace.

1:00pm - 6:00pm
Went to Fry's Electronics to buy a fan and nearly splurged more money on a printer. Had lunch at Super Taqueria and had a horchata while eating leftover beans from girlfriend's wrap. Took girlfriend to a supermarket so she could buy lamb meat, dropped her off at her brother's.

6:00 - 10:00pm
Cooked food for weekend while playing Ghost Recon. Pot full of pasta overflowed because I was too occupied popping a m203 grenade into a Technical. The Americans live for another day. Yes!

10:00 - 1:00am
Dinner at her brother's place while watching a Sonora Carruseles video with women gyrating hips. Got dizzy watching the closeups of hips moving on the projector. Her sister wants me to dance with her while giving her a "Salsa Techniques 101" lesson. 2-year old niece watches on while saying "oh my god" every so often. I leave with free leftovers.

1:00am
Girlfriend is tired from cooking all afternoon and is sleepy. I tell her she can sleep over even though I work the next morning. Took shower to return to sleeping girlfriend in bed. I sleep on floor with nothing but a pillow.

7:45am
Somehow worked my way in my bed during the night. Woke up with girlfriend latched to me while girlfriend smooched me awake. Our clothes are still on...I lived another day with no sex. Yes!

A Woman's Perspective on MySpace

I never realized how much crap women get on MySpace!

Anna was telling me how when she first came online here that she had a pretty easy time registering and posting up her pictures. Her pictures are very nice so I would imagine that she will eventually go through the same things that most women go through, tons of emails and tons of friend requests.

A picture of Anna

The next day she had over 100 hits on her profile with a bunch of friend requests and emails! Most of the guys that sent the requests were straight-up "gangsta" however the ones that didn't have bad spelling or comment just on her looks had some interesting strategies to get a girl's attention.

1. One guy asks a bunch of questions in a paragraph and follows by another paragraph of a quick summary of his accomplishments.
2. Another guy asks if she likes black guys.
3. One just said "wow" three times!
4. One said she had an awesome body and wanted to watch her dance.
5. One sent a joke and an invite to his blogs.
6. An email read "hi licked your pic".
7. One asked her to teach them salsa dancing.
8. Another asked if she could model.

With all that crappy email, all the nice ones get lost in between.

The good decent ones were to the point. Just saying how they want to know her more, she's beautiful, etc etc. I actually felt bad for these guys. imagine how many times they've sent emails to someone they were attracted to, but are decent guys, only to have their emails lost or deleted?

The emails and friend requests continued until Anna changed the way friend requests were done. In order to request her as a friend you'd have to specify her last name or her email address!

The other thing she did was change her status to "In a relationship." Since then, she hasn't received a whole lot of emails...there's still a lot of hits though!

One of the guys, she tells me, was honest and informed her that he was on MySpace to look for a girlfriend. So I guess I can make three assumptions:

- Some guys are on here to stay in touch with friends,
- some guys are here to pick up a girl, and
- some guys are here just to see how many people they can put on their friend's list.

The age change is one way most women tired of these men do to avoid these abundant attentions however it means it would be very difficult for those searching for them...old friends and what-not...to ever pull them up in the search results.

Is any of the methods better than the other? The only thing I know for certain is that I might have friends out there that I've been trying to find, but couldn't find them, because of the age changes they've done.

Jose's Persisting Problem

This story is so funny, I just *had* to share it! This is a good example of how if you really want to get a person's number, you'll find a way to get it!

Premise

Before I can continue, it's important to state some important facts that were covered in previous blogs. To restate:

1. There's a girl from Taiwan (aka Taiwan Girl) that sends him text messages, emails, and calls him every day. he has not responded to a single thing ever. This has been going on since the beginning of the year.

2. There's a girl from club Miami (aka bartender Girl) that's married with a child, but keeps calling and texting him about how she wants to satisfy him and how she wants to mess around with him.

3. Octavio is our partying friend that doesn't seem to know when to stop partying. He's always calling jose to go out dancing, whom in turn calls me.

4. There's an older woman (aka Sandra #2) that has the hots for him, but isn't quite as relevant to this story but will be at a key point later.

5. Jose changed his number right before we stopped going salsa dancing so he could get some peace from these people.

6. His friend Abe, months ago, was interested in a woman...but stopped pursuing her because Jose was interested in her more...and this woman eventually became Jose's girlfriend. That was almost two years ago. His girlfriend is Sandra #1.

7. Octavio is really nice to Bartender girl, who in turn treats him like crap...uses him for drinks...entry into clubs...etc.

Courtesy of Jose, there are pictures for me to share.



Jose & Octavio

First Incident with bartender Girl

Just days after changing his number Abe calls Jose and tells him he needs a wingman. Abe is interested in this one girl and the girl and her friend want to go dancing. Unfortunately, they want to go to Club Miami. We had sworn not to go salsa dancing however Abe pulled a favor on Jose, stating to him that had he not given up on catching some game with Sandra #1 almost two years ago, they would have never hooked up. "You owe me" he tells Jose. So Jose's stuck in a bad rut. He has to go now.

Upon reaching the club bartender girl is nowhere to be seen "Good, she's not here" he thinks to himself. He spots Abe and the girls at the far end bar where bartender girl normally works at. He goes to the bathroom and returns and finds that bartender girl is there!

Jose has told Abe about bartender girl however apparently he's forgotten. "Why don't you leave your jacket with me" says bartender girl. Before Jose could figure out an excuse Abe responds "yeah leave your jacket with her!"



A picture of bartender girl. This is one of her better pictures. Ew.

The assumption at this point is that bartender girl wanted to hold the jacket so that way she could get his phone and get his new number. Fortunately Jose figured this out ahead of time and had put the phone in a hidden part of the jacket where she would have a hard time getting to.

So after a few songs of being a wingman Jose was tired of being there and requests to get his jacket.

Bartender: "Hey you changed your number. Why don't you call me so that way i can get it?"
Jose: "Okay sure, I'll call when I get home."
Bartender: "No, I want you to call me now."
Jose: "Well I can't, I don't have my phone with me."
Bartender: "Well that's fine. Why don't you give me your number right now."

"Crap" he wonders to himself. Fortunately, he's got a back up. He has a friend that he knows doesn't answer calls from phone numbers that he doesn't know, and he still has a generic voicemail.

Jose: "okay, here's my number."

bartender girl then proceeds to call the number...right there! It kicks into voicemail and she's satisfied that she has the number.

Jose: "Okay so can I get my jacket back now?"
Bartender: "Only if you give me a kiss."

She then extends her hand out, like she's the queen or something, while a bunch of guys are around them watching the whole situation.

Jose: "You know what, keep the jacket. I don't want it that bad."

Bartender girl gives him a dirty look, grabs the jacket and throws it at him. He leaves, satisfied that she doesn't have his number.

Taiwan Girl

Taiwan girl has been sending him emails telling him that she's sorry that she hasn't been able to call him because her phone bill's been racking up. She's sent him some interesting emails about how she's making plans to come out, was wondering if she could stay at his place, etc etc. All the while Jose hasn't responded to a single email or voicemail.

About 2 weeks after he changed his number he gets a voicemail from Taiwan girl! "hey baby, sorry I haven't called for awhile. You changed your number! I bumped into your friend so-and-so while he was visiting Taiwan..." "Impossible. How would she get it?" he wondered.

Apparently one of his friends was visiting Taiwan for some apparent reason and bumped into taiwan girl. Taiwan girl told him that she's a friend of Jose and he had changed his number before she could get it from him. Stupidly, the guy thought it was true and gave it to her!

Now if a guy changes his number, doesn't let you know especially when you've been having a relationship with only his phone, wouldn't that be a clue?

Jose calls his friend who says "I didn't know! She says she's your friend and she looks pretty cute!"



Taiwan Girl

Second Incident with Bartender Girl

Jose decides to head to Miami for a quick drink on Saturday night, thinking that it would be quick and okay. I had told him earlier in the day that I spoke to Octavio and that he was going to Monte Carlo tonight. So with Octavio out of the way, no way that there should be trouble. Right?

When he gets there he waves to bartender girl whom in turn gives him a funny look. "What?" he asks. "It's like seeing a ghost" she replies. Riight. Stupid answer from a stupid girl. Anyway he continues on and has a drink and dances with an old friend. He then sees Octavio dancing in the other room! "Ohh great" he wonders. They say hello to each other and Jose tells him "I changed my number so that I could get away from everyone." "Cool cool" Octavio replies.

Jose gets a call from his cousin, who says he's drunk and needs a ride home from the club Rodeo. So he leaves the club and drives to Rodeo only to call his cousin whom does not pick up the phone. After some time not finding him inside, he leaves a message telling him "Okay, I'm at the club but I can't find you. Rather then go home and have you wake me up, I'm going back to Miami's to wait for your call. But you HAVE to call."

So he makes his way back to the club and it's almost closing time. Octavio is drunk out of his mind and Jose worries and says he'll drive him home.

"Look i'm okay I'm okay" Octavio replies. "Okay fine, well give me a call when you get home so that way I know you made it."

"I don't have your number" Octavio replies.

"Crap" Jose thinks to himself. Rather than worry that a friend won't make it home, he takes a risk. "Okay here's my number. Call me when you get home. But if you ever f*cking call me to go out dancing don't even go there, but if you ever call to go out to play pool that's okay."

Sandra #2 is also at the club and asks him to watch over her friend, whom is also drunk out her mind. Sometime later in the night he gets a call:

"Hiiiii. What are you doing?"

Jose: "Umm, i'm okay." It's bartender girl.

Apparently bartender girl saw Octavio and Jose talking to one another with Octavio's phone out that she deduces that Octavio has the number. So what does she do? She obtains the number from the drunk Octavio before Octavio leaves the club.

Sandra #2, during the whole night, never asked for his number. Either she didn't know he changed it or she was polite enough to know that if he really wanted to give it to her he would have done so already. In any case Jose gets off the phone with her somehow and dances with bachata with Sandra #2.

"Don't dance so sexy with me" she tells him. Not dance sexy with Bachata? That's almost impossible unless you're dancing Wachata. He eventually gets caught up dancing bachata where he *has* to get close to her, apparently that was enough to give her an orgasm standing up (I'm concluding) which led to her trying to give him a kiss. "Whoa" he replies while backing off.

They continue dancing and Jose leans into her to thank her for the dance right to her face, and pulls away and gives her a hug.

Well, during this time Bartender girl went to the bathroom and came out right when Jose leaned into Sandra #2. From Bartender's angle, it looked like Jose was kissing her!

That was enough for bartender girl to leave him alone for a day. She sends him a text message saying "Oh I see now. You don't want to talk to me anymore because you have someone else to see."

Apparently bartender girl figures that he has a girlfriend, she has a husband, and she's attracted to him means a good excuse to mess around with him without getting caught. Riight. Have you seen how she looks? And that's a good picture of her.

Oh and his cousin? He never called. He apparently got a ride from a girl he met there and was so wasted he didn't call until late in the night. Around 2:00am when Jose calls *me* to tell me what happened!